Milestones
Today we played with rocks. I have a confession to make. I have no idea what milestones my 11 month old should have accomplished by now. I actually have no idea if some of the things I think are cool that she does are milestones. In general… I am pretty unconcerned with milestones.
I don’t believe in formal education, at all. Ironically my occupation is in part what has led me to shun formalized education. I am going into year 8 as a High School English teacher. Yes, I am literally a part of the formal education system. What I love most about my district, and my position in the secondary classroom specifically is the autonomy to lead my students how I best see fit. Not to turn this post into my teaching philosophy, I’ll be brief, I strongly believe it is my responsibility to give opportunities for my students to learn, and guide them in the process, however it is not my responsibility to control them. I am not a dictator exercising my will on my kids and I vowed in year 1 that I would never be a teacher on a power trip. It is my greatest fear to see 20+ kids sitting silently at their desks, eyes on me, waiting for direction…. It should be your greatest fear as well to think our schools are graduating robots that spit out memorized information without understanding or the ability to free think.
I put zero effort into teaching my child. We also do not have many toys. Our typical day includes her crawling around to play in the bedroom, bathroom and closet when we wake up and I get ready. Her current favorite activities in those spaces are:
Taking the lid on and off of the humidifier
Hooking and unhooking hangers from each other on the floor
Sitting on the scale and watching the number change while she moves around on it
Hiding behind the shower curtain and then moving it back and smiling at me
Throughout this all I am talking to her about our day, clapping for her, telling her what I am doing when she stops to watch me and/or listening to music so we can both do a little dancing.
After that we go to the kitchen to make breakfast. Sometimes I will put her down in the living room where I can see her and she has some books, a couple stuffed animals and a couple balls available. While I make breakfast her favorite things to do are:
Finding the remote so she can crawl around the hardwood with it (It makes a pretty cool banging noise)
Pulling herself up to look at the top of the end table, standing while opening and closing drawers
Climbing on her sweet patient doggy brothers, particularly interesting is their teeth when you lift up their lips
Standing and practicing walking while pushing her high chair over to me
Helping me unload the dishwasher by finding any large cooking utensils to clap together
For the rest of the day in between naps and meals we pretty much go with each other’s flow. While I workout she sits in her stroller and if I take any rest time I will use it to walk or run with her. I’m constantly talking and narrating our day with her. She stands to watch while I feed our baby chicks, she crawls in the grass and the rocks and we are fortunate to have family close so she interacts with older children and other adults regularly.
She has 3 categories of items that are “hers.”
We subscribe to the Lovevery box that sends toys appropriate for her age every 2-3 months. It includes a play guide and instructions on how to introduce and use the items. I throw that away and let her do what she wants.
Books!!! On books. On books. I love books. She loves books. We love books. I do make a conscious effort to always have my own book easily accessible and will choose to read over watching TV. I guess you could say I am modeling that behavior, but it’s not really intentional…I genuinely prefer to read.
Anything that she can climb, jump, ride, build, lift…be active with. I LOVE our NuggetComfort couch. At this stage she can get herself off and on the couch, and likes to stand on the triangle cushions. The stairs in our house are built in play sets. One of her first birthday gifts will be a Ookkie skateboard that she can hold onto and balance while I pull her. I’d like to get her a kitchen tower soon and possibly a climbing rig. Anything that gets her body moving through full ranges of motion gets a 5 star review from me.
That being said, we have taken lots of tumbles. Baring something that could cause serious injury, when I see her making choices with her body I don’t stop her and instead narrate the risks with her. At this stage she is still more apt to choose violence than consider hesitating but as she grows I’d prefer that she knows how to make decisions for herself based on her own evaluations of a situation.
I don’t know if my approach is the best one out there. I try to give myself the same grace I give her. Milestones didn’t even cross my mind until her last pediatric appointment. I had to complete a checklist of things she was capable of doing and although when forced to think about it she was excelling in quite a few of the mentioned areas, I made a mental note that if at some point I was given this sheet for her records I would promptly throw it away. Instead some day I’ll tell her about all the things that made her laugh:
Racing mom to the stairs
Making kissing noises
Crawling away from mom in the bath tub when she isn’t ready to get out
Playing in the dog’s water bowl
Jumping into the pillows on the bed when she is getting her diaper changed
Pretending to brush mom’s teeth with her ‘nanner’ brush
When mom makes stinky faces at her
Getting her hair brushed
Stay wild my littler firecracker. -xoxo
*** Amazon Links below for our favorite things (not included, a link to hangers ;)