Balance

“Mommy I neeeeed you” is the most used phrase in my house right now. With the addition of her baby brother my already clingy toddler has had some big attention needs develop. When Cade came home she was asked in a big way to adjust her normal.

At a time in her toddlerhood where sharing is a developing skill, Kenn had to start sharing her mom. She loves to cuddle, she loves to play, she loves to be together and I have been doing my best to fill her bucket while taking care of an infant.

I have struggled lately. I constantly feel like my mind is in a dozen places at once. I’ve really been having trouble staying present to the moment I am in.

A couple moms have asked me how to find time for yourself without feeling guilty and to be honest, that’s a skill I’m still learning. Right or wrong my default to any event is ‘if my kids can’t come I’m not going.’

Part of that is being a working mom and knowing my time with them is already limited; so I don’t want to miss anything.

A few strategies I use to help reach my goals are:

• I never do a workout that’s over 30 minutes

• I workout early in the morning while my toddler is still sleeping

• I bring my kiddos with me to the gym, or workout at home while they play

• I do stroller workouts where I go for a run with my toddler or incorporate lunges or light weights work during a walk

• Planning a grocery pick up so no one has to get out of the car

• Baby wearing while I cook the week’s meal prep

• Involve my toddler by using a kitchen tower and her own cooking utensils

  To be completely honest lately I have been feeling the effects of a burnout and I have struggled to stay motivated. As I alluded in the beginning I can easily fall into the trap of putting too much on my plate and not feeling fully committed to the moment.

  Of all the things to find inspiration from, a kids cartoon gave me the best advice for these seasons. ‘Take things step by step and do one task completely before moving onto the next.’

  As moms too often we try to juggle all the balls at once keeping everything in the air at play at all times. We need to slow down, focus on accomplishing one thing at a time then move to the next.

  I have been struggling to give each of my kiddos enough and was trying to be everything for everyone all at once.

  Instead, I am focusing on quality.

• Giving my toddler quality one on one playtime as soon as I am home from school and intentional snuggles before bedtime.

• Leaning into my nursing sessions with my baby; no phone distractions, no trying to play at the same time, giving him all my attention.

  Whatever it is that I’m doing, that’s the thing I am focused on. Being intentional about the moment and not letting my mind overwhelm me with thoughts about everything else.

  Some days are going to be consumed with your kids needs. It’s their season right now. Ultimately the scale will tip towards them more often than not.

  I think we are too preoccupied with the idea of balance. There are seasons of life that we go through where our focus may shift. Include your kids in as much of the routine of life as possible.